I wonder what my children will remember about this time in our lives. Will they remember that their Daddy worked very long hours but always tickled and wrestled them when he got home? Or that he was always on the phone but loved to jump on the trampoline with them and dreamed of taking them fishing?
Will they remember that Mama was so tired she could cry but always tried to play games with them and cook fun stuff like pancakes and muffins? Or that she was swamped in unfolded clothes but loved to play pirates or spaceships while swinging with them in the hammock? Or that she resented people who under-value motherhood and housework or that she told really amazing stories about dragons and gold? I sat today and wondered how much they know.
I looked at my very busy and very mobile Master 1 exploring the garden and eating sticks and wondered where the past year had gone. A whole chunk of time has been absorbed by endless sleeplessness, crying, and sickness, exploration, giggling and teaching. Time hasn’t gone past me as much as engulfed me . . . Master 4 tells me he’s ‘nearly ten’, has started writing and cannot wait to go to ‘big school’. Master 2’s behaviour is greatly improved and he loves helping make biscuits and lying with me to watch the shapes in the clouds.
Many times when Mr Magentafrog gets home in the evening I kiss him hello/goodbye as I head out to our office to catch up on admin work. We are tremendously busy and rely heavily on each other to make sure our lives run smoothly. But there are always cracks that things get lost in – sometimes we’re too busy to stop and hug each other or we only talk about work for days on end and date nights are a long-lost ideal presently . . . As with any relationship that gets stretched in all directions with little time to work on itself, there are little stress fractures that need attention. One of my strongest childhood memories is that my parents held hands while watching television. My brother and I would tease them, but we loved them and we knew we were loved. Will our children always remember how much we loved them? Or just how busy and stressed out we were most of the time?
I know this has been weighing on Mr Magentafrog’s mind, as it has mine but we’ve not had a chance to talk about it. And so we are getting away from it all – it’s time. For the first time ever as a family we are heading bush on a camping trip in a few days for five days. We are going to a really remote location, where not even our phones will work. The children are talking about cooking marshmallows on a stick and catching big fish and the boat has been prepared.
We are all getting excited. I cannot wait to see our boys catching fish, exploring and having the time of their lives.