Mr MF and I had never been on a date since getting married and having kids. But with some much-needed ‘together time’ in order we agreed that every Wednesday we would so something together in the evening. That could be a swim, a hit of squash or tennis, a picnic or going out for dinner. These days our lives are more about organising around the kids rather than spontaneity; I will take what I can get!
Our first date night coincided with my 37th Birthday. I knew there was not going to be any surprises (aside from the tropical flowers my beautiful Mum had delivered to me!). I knew Mr MF had to work late then go to a meeting but he planned on getting us some takeaway and then to head out to sit on our boat and watch the sun go down with a bottle of wine. This sounded like a lovely idea.
So I got organised for it. I got the kids dinner on time and tidied the house (ha!). They did not cooperate; milk and food got thrown everywhere and Master 3 hit me because he couldn’t have dessert, there were fights, crying, yelling and time outs. This bad behaviour comes after a week of being angels for their Dad while I was away on a sanity break. I needed another sanity break after just five days at home.
I put the boys in the bath, the baby in the cot and went for a walk around the garden, lest I choke them! I called Mr MF and told him I needed him home immediately. He came home and miraculously all was calm. The kids are able to torture me while we’re home alone and then make me look like I need to be institutionalised as soon as another adult appears!
Despite all that we were almost ready by the time our babysitter arrived. I was determined to dress up. So I threw on a dress, some lippy and some heels and refused to look in my full length mirror before declaring silently to myself that I looked fab.
I forcibly prized two howling boys from my legs (they were deliberately wiping their noses on my dress) and handed the baby over to the sitter. Remorselessly I got out the door and shut myself in the car while Mr MF settled everyone.
By this time it was too late for the boat and sunset idea so we headed to a local restaurant for dinner. The meal was fantastic. The gin and tonics were way too nice. The conversation and company was interesting. Dates are good for me. Dates keep me regularly interested in my husband and let me reconnect emotionally and physically. It gives me space to talk about something other than the kids. I was an adult for a night.
. . . With dinner finished we headed out for a drive and joked about going ‘parking’ and how we’d die of embarrassment if we got caught nookying in a Tarago (any other model of car would be fine). Then we redlined the family wagon to a local takeaway joint and bought chocolate drumsticks and a bounty to share. We were home by 9:00pm and had really enjoyed ourselves. Best of all the kids were asleep.
Do you have date nights with your partner? What makes a good one?